IN HONOR OF NATIONAL ADOPTION MONTH, I AM TELLING MY ADOPTION STORY FOR THE FIRST TIME IN PUBLIC (THE RAW, UNEDITED, NON-ANONYMOUS VERSION…EEP!). FOR PART 1, GO HERE. For Part 2, GO HERE.
If you caught the cliffhanger in Part 2 of this story, I’m providing evidence right here.
Because obviously, I had to stop and take a photo. I mean, it was just so unbelievable!
Okay, to recap, I’m plugging along in the adoption process, looking at switching to the China program and still feeling like our child is in Korea.
To tell the next part of the story, I am extracting the content from my old adoption blog, because it captures in a very raw way what happened next. Context: This was about one month after hearing that we would have to be in a one-year holding pattern or consider switching to China.
“We Interrupt This Zen Moment…
…to bring you earth-shattering, life-altering news.
In a good way.
That’s basically what I heard yesterday after having received a phone call from our agency’s director during my hike with the dogs. I usually take them hiking once a week to let them run free and to commune with nature. It’s totally zen, and I love it.
So, I’m walking along listening to birds chirp and watching the dogs be in the moment when the ring of my phone marred those lovely sounds of nature. I bring my phone with me as a just-in-case kinda thing, because I got lost hiking once (thankfully, my dog got me outta there…animals are awesome).
I didn’t recognize the number, so I didn’t answer it, and was actually surprised to hear the familiar ping letting me know there was a voicemail. I picked it up.
And that’s when my zen was entirely disrupted.
The director said something to the effect of, “We have an urgent situation, and I need you to call me as soon as possible.”
“Shit,” is what I thought. “What else? Now we’re not eligible for China either???”
Obviously I called back immediately. She asked if I was sitting. I told her I was hiking, but I’d find a rock. And I did. She then proceeded to tell me the craziest thing ever: A family just had their adopted son escorted from Korea last Friday, and they aren’t doing well. For privacy reasons, I won’t go into detail, but basically, they don’t want to finalize the adoption.
And our agency is asking us to adopt him!!!!!!
We have to decide by today, and he would need to be placed with us by Friday.
Yeah. Thank God I was sitting.
We’re scared shitless, and nervous, and feeling crazy, and overwhelmed. We have nothing. No carseat, no toddler food, no toys, no bath stuff, no nursey set-up, no outlet covers. Nothing. Zip. Zilch. Nada.
But we have love. We have a LOT of love.
Come to think of it, the whole scared-nervous-crazy-overwhelmed thing? Um, that sounds a lot like we’re preparing for another IVF. We know how to do that!
Are you up for a wild ride? I think we are.
Stay tuned…”
Forty-eight hours later, to the minute, we became parents.
And folks, this is only the beginning. What absolute joy this little guy has brought to our lives! I would be remiss, however, if I didn’t mention that our joy meant our little guy’s absolute terror, confusion, and exquisite emotional pain. Yes, he was getting a loving new home, but he lost so much in the process. It’s one of those things that we continue to honor with every adoption celebration.
I don’t believe I can adequately express the hope that I have for people still in the trenches; those moving ever so slowly toward becoming parents.
Parenthood is inevitable, if you so choose. And it is your choice.
Whether you choose no treatment, Eastern Medicine, Traditional Chinese Medicine, IVF, IUI, Donor Gametes, Donor Embryos, Embryo Adoption, Surrogacy, Foster Adoption, or Domestic or International Adoption, you will be a parent one day! Or you will resolve that secondary infertility. There are probably options I haven’t even listed here for goodness’ sake!
You need only keep on keepin’ on. And you will have immense joy the likes of which words are unable to capture.
Heads up, don’t rule out a beautiful life without parenthood. It is fully possible to capture the above joy in your life after stopping the journey to parenthood (again, your choice — this is a form of taking your power back!).
“The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” -Lao Tzu
Infertility feels like a million miles. And even that journey begins with a single step. Keep walking.
May every single one of your parenthood dreams come true.
The End Beginning
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